


Time Out

by radondoran



Category: Phineas and Ferb
Genre: Fainting, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, UST
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-07
Updated: 2012-07-07
Packaged: 2017-11-09 09:02:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,276
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/453738
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/radondoran/pseuds/radondoran
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Sheesh, Perry the Platypus, how hard did you hit me?"</p><p>But Perry's worried look was answer enough.</p><p>"You didn't?" Doofenshmirtz confirmed.  "You mean—you mean I just keeled over right in the middle of our fight?"</p>
            </blockquote>





	Time Out

_"Wait, time out, time out."_ The words echoed in Doofenshmirtz's ears and he searched for a context in which to place them. He supposed he had said them, since Perry the Platypus didn't talk much. That was it—now he remembered—Perry the Platypus. He'd been dreaming about fighting with Perry the Platypus. He must still be dreaming now.

In the darkness he became aware of a tiny, furry hand on his brow, and another gently stroking his cheek. He stirred, and the hands pulled back.

He opened his eyes. Perry the Platypus, standing on the floor in front of his face, came slowly into focus. Doofenshmirtz groaned. "Sheesh, Perry the Platypus, how hard did you hit me?"

But Perry's worried look was answer enough.

"You didn't?" Doofenshmirtz confirmed. And now he could place the words. _"Wait, time out, time out. Ho—hold on, Perry the Plat—Platypus, I gotta—catch my breath—"_ He had called time because he'd suddenly felt dizzy and sick—kind of like he still felt right now, in fact. "You mean—you mean I just keeled over right in the middle of our fight?"

Perry nodded, his brow still knitted in concern.

Doofenshmirtz wiped his clammy forehead. "Ugh, how embarrassing. Listen, do me a solid and don't tell Major Monogram about this, okay? I'll never live it... what?"

Sheepishly, Perry held up his wrist communicator.

"Ah, Heinz, you're awake," said Monogram on the screen. "You had us worried there when you swooned."

Doofenshmirtz shot a glare at Perry the Platypus, who shrugged. "I didn't _swoon_ ," he grumbled.

Monogram chose not to object to the blatant untruth. "Agent P, our medical team is standing by," he said.

"Whoa, whoa, medical team? I'm fine!" Doofenshmirtz insisted. "Come on, Perry the Platypus, let's get back to it, we're already behind schedule as it is."

Perry growled and held up a hand forbiddingly, but Doofenshmirtz leapt to his feet.

"Now, then, I was just about to activate my Lost-Socks-inator, and you... you-woo..." Again the room tilted sickeningly, and he was reasonably certain it wasn't the work of the Tilt-inator. "Oh—oh man. Perry the Platypus?" He reached out for him blindly, foolishly; Perry the Platypus wasn't tall enough to support him. But a tiny, furry hand caught his outstretched finger, and the grip was solid in the swirling gloom.

Perry led Doofenshmirtz the few steps to the couch, where he half-sat, half-collapsed, and rested his head between his knees. "Don't you dare say you told me so," he mumbled. Perry might have rolled his eyes, but nonetheless he climbed up onto the couch beside Doofenshmirtz and began rubbing his back.

"He did tell you so," came Monogram's stern voice above him.

"Can it, Francis."

"As I was saying, our medical team is standing by, but I won't send them in unless Agent P gives the word."

Perry must have shaken his head.

"All right. Vital signs are normal?" Perry must have nodded. "No fever?"

Doofenshmirtz remembered the gentle touch that had awakened him. "Oh," he said aloud, "so that's what that whole 'caressing my face' thing was all about! You were checking my temperature!"

"Actually," said Monogram, "I was referring to the readings from the bio-scanners we installed in Agent P's hat. What are you talking about?"

Scanners? Doofenshmirtz sat up, not so much because he felt better as because he wanted to be able to see Perry the Platypus's face. Perry looked as though, if he hadn't already been teal, he would have blushed.

"Um—nothing?" said Doofenshmirtz, abruptly feeling that he wasn't supposed to have noticed.

Monogram looked from one to the other of them as best he could from his position on Perry's outstretched arm. "Okay..." he said doubtfully. "Anyway, Doof, what happened?"

"Nothing!" Doofenshmirtz repeated. "Nothing. I don't know what I was talking about, nothing happened."

Perry the Platypus executed a facepalm with his free hand.

"I _mean_ the swooning," said Monogram.

"Oh. Oh, I—I knew that. I dunno, it was no big deal, I just, you know, got dizzy for a sec. I was so busy putting the finishing touches on this Inator that I didn't eat any breakfast. And it's been so hot lately... Oh, yeah, and I gave blood yesterday. I bet that's part of it."

Perry and Monogram both looked surprised. "You gave blood?" said Monogram. "That's not very evil."

"Wait, it's not?"

Perry and Monogram slowly shook their heads.

Doofenshmirtz was shocked. "But—but they've got all those scary tubes and machinery and stuff! Plus, I mean, you know,"—he wiggled his fingers to accentuate the creepiness of the word—" _bloooood!_ "

"Giving blood saves lives—didn't you read the posters?"

"What?! All these years I thought it was for, like, vampires or something. Man!"

Monogram rolled his eyes. "Well, you're obviously back to normal—normal for you, anyway. Call me if you need anything else, Agent P."

The communicator switched itself off. Doofenshmirtz and Perry the Platypus were left alone together.

"Well," said Doofenshmirtz. "I suppose—hey, what are you doing?"

Perry the Platypus climbed onto Doofenshmirtz's lap and stood there looking keenly into his face. Doofenshmirtz stared back into the sharp brown eyes and breathed shallowly, not knowing what to expect.

Perry the Platypus raised a finger and waved it back and forth in the air.

"Oh." Doofenshmirtz relaxed and followed the finger with his eyes. "You're making sure I didn't hit my head. Got it." He laughed. "For a second there I thought... Well, it's not important. A—anyhoo," and he put the sarcasm back into his voice, "do I pass inspection?"

Perry the Platypus nodded.

"Okay. In that case, _prepare to face the awesome power of_ —what?"

Perry the Platypus growled forbiddingly again.

"What? I'm fine now, really. I'm not going to pass out again. Again," he added. "Come on, let me up."

Perry the Platypus held him back with a hand on his chest. He struggled to rise, but in vain.

"Hey! Come on! You only weigh like five pounds, how are you pinning me? All right!" he conceded, sinking back into the couch. "All right, Perry the Overprotectivepus. Jeez. How about I take the day off and lost-socks-inate the Tri-State Area tomorrow? Is that okay with you? Would that make you happy?"

Perry released his hold.

"Finally. Hey, since I'm not doing anything evil today anyway, you want to go get some lunch?"

Perry gave him another stern look.

Doofenshmirtz rolled his eyes. "All right, fine, no going out. We'll order in. How about Chinese? I have a coupon."

Perry shrugged acquiescingly. There was a pause.

"Um, Perry the Platypus?"

Perry blinked before realizing he was still in Doofenshmirtz's lap. He moved aside and sat down on the couch.

Doofenshmirtz stood up to reach the phone and call in their order. Perry watched him carefully, and did not look satisfied until he had sat down again. Doofenshmirtz laughed. "I'm fine!" he said again. But somehow it pleased him that Perry wasn't quite convinced yet. It hadn't been often in his life that anybody had cared this much about his well-being. Even though passing out in front of your nemesis was inherently humiliating, it was kind of nice to have someone fuss over him for once.

He flipped on the TV. "I hope you like soap operas." He waited a moment before speaking again. "Perry?"

Perry looked up at him.

"Thanks for being worried about me."

Perry smiled and rolled his eyes, as if to say he hadn't been _that_ worried. He leaned against Doofenshmirtz, and the two of them settled in for the second hour of _El Matador de Amor_.


End file.
